And, right, we had a joint account…
Not sure who brought this idea first, but we somehow opened a joint account. Not too many real couples would do this nowadays. So each of us would save some money to the account at the beginning of the month, so we could just use the card without spliting the expenses when we go eat dinner or do grocery shopping together. This REALLY bonds us together, not only financially. We make all those important decisions at home together, like… like do we eat bagels this week or muffins, do we eat beef or chicken this week, do we have have more kitchen towels or more toliet tissue this week… yeah, like really serious decisions. But you know what, when you are in your first two years of graduate school, when nobody takes you (the rookie) seriously, you need to start making your life serious by yourself. And Chen and I did, by making these real (food) decisions, making espresso coffee every morning, and trying to adopt healthie life styles (yeah… mostly from eating, at this point… )
Chen’s pretty good at details, like all those people who start slow. She quickly “mastered” all those details about food, which brand is the best, what particular kind of food do we need this week, so I mainly just followed her instructions. When I was little, the only criteria for making a new friend, is to get along well on the condition that we are similar. Growing up, it’s more and more difficult to actually find someone who are similar to you (like me and Xuan, this rare rare case LOL). However, eventually, you realize, you become really really good friends with people who are not that similar to you, like me and JIS, and now, me and Chen.
Chen and I are different person in so many fundemental ways. She care about details, have good memories, independent, while I tend to ignore details a lot of times, bad memories, aweful sense of direction, seem to be independent but really, dependent in a lot of ways, and easy to be influenced. Nevertheless, we appreciate similar things, good friends, beautiful things in life and good food (even though she eats them after appreciating them LOL). It’s like we approach similar life goals via different routes. This might be the reason why we got along so well, we don’t simply just step into each other’s territory and try to make changes (i hate to admit growing up means you realize that it’s impossible to change someone’s essential personalities and life styles, you can only learn to accept and appreciate if you love this person), we understand those differences, and we make changes in ourselves to compensate each other. She learned to cook spicy food, i would play her favourite music using my loud speakers whenever possible, i would sometimes walk to school, just like her, spending 30 to 40 mins walking from home to c-town, she started purchasing and wearing more femanine clothes like i do.
And especially, when two people have gone through that friend zone, at least for me, they become part of my family (not sure what word to use here). I would consider Chen as part of my life, I won’t judge her anymore, things about her, good or bad, like it or not, i accept those, unconditionally, this is one of the people that i will forever cherish in my life, cause i know she will always be there for me, like i’ll always be there for her. I am actually very happy that i have been influenced by her. I am always pretty laid-back when it comes to these daily decisions, like what food to buy in the super market, which restaurant to go to, what stores to go to, as long as she likes it, i am OK with it and I want to see her happy smile (more like … langh).